im neck deep in insecurities
these days its been so bad that i can hardly breathe
and
a sense of wonder's dull brief eulogy
i wrote from all the lies i told you thru my teeth.
god it makes me sick
the filth I'm calloused in
your words, my dizziness, and my neurotic isolation.
still thru my decay,
your voice shakes with disdain
"you're sickening, you sicken me" is all i ever hear these days.
I'm up against a wall thats breaking thru
the weight of an apology that you were never true to
im slipping on i don't know what to do
im sick of staring at the floor, I'm gonna puke.
and all my memories
will turn back into steam
along with all the constellations stitched into my seams
and
I'm self destructing fast
i ran down the wrong path
and now I'm face to face with all the sympathy I've always lacked.
cause lord knows I'm tired to the bone
and this sidewalk supplies great support.
I've fallen in love with the recklessness of
my own failure to cope.
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